A Yes, A No

Hot coffe in a clean white mug, and a smile when the waitress hears

2011-08-27T01:47:00.000-07:00

Surprise parcel from Flipkart at work! Its The Gunseller :) I'm at once totally thrilled, totally shocked, totally, totally touched. So few times in life. Thank you, Monkey :) And totally confused as to how I should return the gesture. :P

--

Simple pleasures - the make-do window seat! And I can now climb precariously over the grill and look at the rain shaking up the outside world, while sipping away at my drink and reading my book. And there's music in the background. And sometimes people dancing or being randomly happy, or talking, or just sitting and being there.

--

I could stop the looking, the waiting, the reading into. But can I just be free, and give and say, and feel?

Riding the bus :D

2011-08-25T06:20:00.000-07:00

I am, quite literally riding a bus. The lovely, air-conditioned, upholstered, big windowed AS-4. This is how I go back home every evening after work. The ticket fare is Rs. 35 and it takes a good 2 hours or so to reach. But these are 2 really well spent hours for me, where I catch up on my reading, music, and starting today - writing :) Plus, its often raining during the ride (Bombay, hello) so to the left or right of me is the heartwarming sight of water swishing across the windows, blurring the brilliant Bombay skyline and reflecting back all its colorful lights.

--

Office. I realized I really enjoy my quiet table, strategically positioned an arm's stretch from Amrita's. I enjoy her constant banter with Mak and me and whoever else stops by. Most of all, I enjoy her, the way she operates, the energy, the enthusiasm, the quirkiness. Working with her is incredible learning and incredible fun, and I don't know if things could have worked out any better than this for me. Also, its a major comfort knowing this profile is real, ground level stuff that will get implemented and will drive sales, and will contribute somehow to the business. I also somehow like the "give it to the trainee" work that everyone seems to keep handing out to me. I like pottering from floor to floor looking super efficient and super busy and having my finger in these many pies. SO much better than the sorry days of unproductivity at Delhi. The other fascinating person in HR is Jackie. WOW! What. a. woman. Poised, intelligent, practical, totally with the times and oh-so-chill. I hope I work with her too one day.

--

This week was probably the best time living ever. Wamuuuu, carriage rides to Gateway, the paaaaan, my ditcher girlfriend, Booby Trap days, Paddy, revising the alphabet, viciously ripping apart movie plots, character names, titles. The songssssss, so many songs. Inventive meals, supremely predictably irrational behaviour, friday house parties, experiments with song and smoke, sambar rice with a hole in them, the SHOWER, late night cruises, and having water, water everywhere and nothing, nothing to spare.

Bombay equals automatic happiness. :)

a thousand kisses to the skies!!

2011-08-11T00:56:00.000-07:00

Bombay, here I come!! :D :D

The whole story when I really, truly GO, coz I don't want to jinx this deliriously happy moment! :)

Sold :D

2011-07-30T10:22:00.000-07:00

Sales stint khatam! :) :) Oh lord, walking, walking, walking through the dust, the heat, the flies, the damned South Delhi sun beating down on me to no endddd, and then wading through knee deep waters in the North! Wet with sweat, or drenched by rain, and still beating away. The long, long afternoons of talking! Talking endlessly to shopkeepers, salesmen, stockists, hanging on every word for dear life! Peeing in horrid filthy places hahahaha! The tongue twister languageeee, frowning and cringing, trying to understand what on earth they meannnn! And then slowly learning it, speaking the language! Of numbers, margins, bargains, clandestine meanings. Rather fun times, actually :D

Man. The traditional trade visits were exhausting, the characters encountered on the way were super entertaining, the wholesale market was mind blowing and finishing with modern trade was just charming! The best part was definitely the week in UP with Rajinder. But what I enjoyed the most is just getting to know that life - the field - the hustle and bustle of trade, these people who do that kind of work, and live in this city on 5000 bucks a month.

It really was an experience. But God, I don't get how anyone can do this for life! Insane, sheer, bottomless capacity for talking! Endless talk! Exhausting, hehe! Boy am I glad I didn't choose to do this for life! Thank you for a super interesting month, but bye bye Sales! :)

Babies all grown up :)

2011-07-14T13:19:00.001-07:00

Maybe it's silly. But listening to Pinky excitedly tell me about the new Admissions team selection makes me beam with pride. And that PPT, my god! I can just about picture Shiny at it! :) And picture Jabu and Subi delivering the impassioned speeches, taking the interviews. Awww! I miss those crazy days. Those crazy two years. :)

Blog post excerpt from this time last year:

So is the experience of interviewing people for something you really care about and don't want to see in the wrong hands. Wrong has so many definitions, so many realities, so many existences. It can tear you up, beat you down, make you cry, make you smile to silliness. It is unbelievable. Having that power is scary. Feeling totally powerless is scarier. Watching people turn away in ignorance, wondering if their irrationality is a dis-satisfier, being pulled one way and the other in utter panic is totally nerve wracking. Looking down at yourself, wondering why you're doing and saying what you are, wondering what made you believe something so strongly a second ago and what makes you believe the opposite now, trying to keep your sanity in a topsy turvy world and all the while falling, falling helplessly into this void of your own self creation, this finale, this ultimate that there is no way out of.

Here's to the best thing he has done in the last 6 years :)

The best thing I did in the last two years too.

Also, weirdly enough, this happened too in that post last year:

After all of this and all of that, when he calls up like that and says all these things, I can't help but melt. When he goes ahead and does something about it, I can't stop. Love is so much deeper than logic.

I wish I could remind myself of that more often.

He called up today too. Said - "If you wait long enough, the Right Time sometimes returns" :)

10 on 10 still :)

2011-07-12T10:14:00.000-07:00

Just another one of the old-me type things I thought I'd do, while we were on the subject of whatever works for me :)

Me:

hahahahah

no actually im okay with it

its fun to be in the field

and the DSRs are a riot

especially this one who im supposed to supervise

plus its an experience :)

so you know

its the damn SO i cant stand!

god, what a PAIN!

Anonymous

:-) i like how you've come to be someone who throws those abbreviations in a casual conversation like the other person is supposed to understand it all..

Welcome onboard madam..

PS - Remember, Mr. ESPN - in life, as in sport, timing is the most critical of all things. Pun intended :)

Forever-ness!

2011-07-12T10:06:00.000-07:00

My mittens-wearing, heart floating riot, who lives to amuse, is a little weird thinget, and everything about me loves her :)

{Let's Get It On music!}

As I do my funky boy, who finds rurals interesting and wants to go to TGIF with my damaged chemically straightened thought process. All the rest just meltsssss! Melts, I tell ya! <3

Superman away!

2011-07-04T11:01:00.000-07:00

Memories that will carry me through the next 11 weeks, until its back to Bombay days:

*Driving through Tardeo, past the luxury cars showrooms, past the Haji Ali market, through Fort, past the ancient Victorian architecture, past the clock tower, past the town hall, over the big open roads, all the way to the hustle bustle of Colaba. The way the roads formed in my mind as we drove, long days of long walks coming back.

*Raw Gokul revelry. Being in the middle of hot, noisy, lighted tables, buzzing with drunken clamor, loud enough that you can't hear the voices in your own head.

*Creating inside jokes for life and being hugged tightly under the flashing neon lights of Mondegar. I'll miss that incredible, intelligent, sensitive, thoughtful, polite, respectful, hilarious, endearing, mustached, superior race ipad.

*The odd, misshapen, brass utensils and conversations at the first place we ever went to.

*Crass calls of 10 ka 3 outside the boarded up ticket windows of Gaiety Galaxy, hundreds joining in silent gesturing, rapidly communicating in their own well known secret language, while several rings of beedi smoke float through the air.

*Easy, non stop giggles over Irish coffee and muffins in Prithvi.

*A beach, an umbrella, a camera phone and three mad girls.

*The Soda Lounge :D

*One more Strictly Experiential train journey, soaked in the night, and the salty air, that I wished would never end.

*A windy, wavy, middle of the night, Marine Drive send off, with all my Bombay people.

*Driving back through the darkness, the horizon peppered with city lights, the glorious Bombay skyline, the towering high rises and the expansive street dwellers, driving through the disparity which converges and diverges, bounces up crests and rolls off troughs, just like the Sea Link does; humming along to nameless, strangely perfect old Bollywood songs, tailor made for these drives :)

*Slumber party, early morning photo session, terrible bracket love ruining movie and super delicious, redeeming, day saving, authentic South Indian brunch!

Yummy is right. Not packing everything always gives hope. I'll be back my darling Bombay.

And until then, I'll try and be Superman and hang out with them mind-reading types, ahem :)

Little flicker of time

2011-07-01T12:44:00.001-07:00

Before this song ends, before the salt gets sucked out of the air, before the centers get pushed into a corner, before my words get interrupted by my thoughts. :)

I love experiences which strike you so hard, they make everything spin on its tail for a little while. People who speak tragically beautiful or ruefully ugly words - the right words, words that you never thought could be spoken like that, could be made to mean that; or the wrong words, so wrong you barely understand them, but want to hear them over and over again in strange depravity. And then suddenly they pour forward like liquid heat, and wrap in a trail around the inside of your head. I love being shoved face-first into the reality that there are entire universes out there that I know nothing about. Entire communities, families, societies thriving in ways I could never imagine, and have never stopped to notice. I love being close enough to touch, but too far to feel. I love stealing second glances, straining to overhear whispered nothings.

And I love the release of stepping back, letting go, simplifying. Not thinking. I wonder if for a while, I just stop thinking. Will the world be at all affected? :)

Thus ends the M1 of travels, colleagues, corporates and lessons! Here's to the rest, and the rest of the paychecks :)

One Humbly Grateful, to Grumbly Hateful

2011-06-23T11:15:00.001-07:00

Long, listless Delhi days. Heat, sweat, dust in my eyes, tempers flying. Constant muted self consciousness. An utter lack of ability, the feeling of endless, stagnant can't - can't listen, can't think, can't do, can't ask, can't try, can't go, can't call, can't wear, can't be. And won't. A single, cruel, selfish, unstoppable release point. Why do I do thatttttttt! What is wrong with me? Why is it like this! And the damn bus rides. These fucking, flagrant, suffocating memories.

Rah rah rah.

I hate this weather, these fake, showy, stand offy people, their constant ogling, their lack of respect for others, for time, for work, for money, their sexual frustrations, their contempt, myself! I hate Delhi-me! Why am I back again?? To this collection of super-sized, steel paneled, sound proofed doors. Just doors. Slammed shut.

Its impossible, living here. Take me back to Bombay, God!

God bless, AR Rahman!

2011-06-20T11:12:00.000-07:00

May he live for 100, 200, 1000 years! :)

Sigh, life is so fun! Such characters around, such niiiiiice people, sweet, caring, considerate, tactful, intelligent, well read. Funnyyyyy! Hahaha! So funny. And such great music. And such long drives. And so much to laugh about. :)

Sigh! <3

Cow Humor!

2011-06-16T10:28:00.001-07:00

*In the ideal situation, what should happen is you should milk the cow and Complan should come out.

*Imagine if the cows could talk. They would say, sorry bhai, aj kal lean season hai!

*Haha, no! Le-e-e-ann! :D

*Hurrrr! Let go, let go! *kicks out*

:D OMG! We laughed and laughed! The boys are so much fun! Such a simpler life. This is what that group looks like: a gujju, a sardarji, a jain from bihar, a non-hindi speaking tam brahm and a delhi-ite! Hahahahahahahah!! It just doesn't get better :)

You bloody rassam-lover! You bloody son of a khakhra! So much jainuine chool! :D

Flood aa gaya!

2011-06-16T10:17:00.003-07:00

I despise girly girls.

Hormonal imbalances and emotional fluxes and unnecessary complications of simple life situations. Oh, God. Let me live wherever and do whatever, just don't let it be in such close proximity to such specimens of nature. Especially the types who are such Big (b)A-bies.

Excuse me while I do more of my contemptuous laughing and simultaneous barfing.

Music, Moans, Monologues and Dialogues

2011-06-15T08:38:00.000-07:00

Ah, week one in Bombay! Already my brain is full to the brim of lifetime worthy memories, heehee :D I planned to regale my 4-odd readers with grand stories ranging from sales beats and HR good practices to shoe shopping, delightful autowalahs and teatime munchies, but time and space constraints will permit only certain super-shiny highlights to be shared. Here goeth:

*It's official - I truly adore rain. I thought Bombay rains with their never ending, flood causing, traffic jamming persistence would grow to repel me, but after a whole 10 days of endlessly splashing through puddles and taking 2 hours to get to a place 10 minutes away, I steeeeeel love rain! We were driving for something like 4 hours one afternoon to visit some distributor in some far away corner of Bombay, and the radio was on in the car. While everyone else tried to catch up on sleep, or muttered irritably about the inconvenience, I sat smiling giddily through the music and the water on the windshield, swaying in delight to cheesey Shahrukh Khan songs. I guess no matter what I become or who I'm pretending to be, there will always be that sycophantic, mushy side of me that will hum along to romantic hindi film songs on those kinds of afternoons :)

*The first-ever feelofchemicalimbalanceinthebrain, ahem, just in case this page gets compromised, finally, finally happened! :D I don't know how to describe it, I guess a general wooziness, accompanied by bouts of inexplicable, helpless giggling and this kind of disdain for the world around me in general. I was saying things I wouldn't normally say out loud, and oh my, I understand how that could be dangerous so luckily it was with The Booby Trap! :D I one thousand <3s those two! In our semi-controlled states we actually managed to have real deep conversations, apart from the general continuous euphoria and mindless laughter. Man, what a great night! Then yesterday, I was with Cheapie and while going through his wallet we found this old tiny card that I had written him. We had both completely forgotten it existed and just couldn't remember how it got there! Made me realize how long its been, that we actually have memories we've buried so far and deep down. Mark of old friendships, no? Ended with a brand new card too :D

*Saturday was the night of the theatre! We went to Prithvi at long last, and oh.my.dear.god. how I love that place! The Vagina Monologues production by four beautiful, superbly talented actresses that gave me goosebumps. Live performances are so powerful, so heart-wrenching, so impactful, so right there in your face. Two hours of sheer wonder, from laughing till our stomachs hurt, till staring in awe wondering what on earth is going on here. The actual auditorium was a cosy, tiny, very personal space, and the lights, the darkness, the sounds, my gosh! It was brilliant, wonderful, a hundred other superlatives. It is so going to be a regular fixture. Just wait :D Also, the Prithvi cafe, right outside the theatre with its artsy customers, cinematic lights, bright tables with board games painted on them in vibrant watercolors, and the delicious famous Irish coffee! Oh, I must have more! :D

12 days to the return!

Bomb-AYE! :D

2011-06-05T03:30:00.000-07:00

I eez here at last! :)

Ahhh, such a long time coming! But finally, finally - the settling in is complete, the plans have been detailed, important people have been met, the train journeys have commenced and the Tata Photon has been purchased! :D A quick bit-by-bit on the story so far:

The Work

On several important counts, this company scores way better than the previous. The people seem down to earth, friendly, intelligent and approachable. They are a generous seeming lot, although no amount of 5-star treatment could match up to the extravagances of my previous boss, and the few small cut-backs they prescribe for us seem only too reasonable considering their size and scale in India. I do rather LOVE the way their MT program is structured though! We're a small group - 14 in total, and will be travelling and visiting locations and markets together for the next month, post which we'll all do cross functional stints in different offices till December and then a core stint for the final 6 months. Ooh, the travel and the exposure and the many experiences we'll have! Sales stints have already begun, and are a complete revelation, and factory follows. In simple words, I'm excited. And I wasn't at all sure I would be. :)

The House

As far as living arrangements go, the universe seems to be in constant conspiracy against me. The memories of the disastrous days at Neeta aunty's bug ridden establishment had barely faded in my mind, and already this place is giving it serious competition. To be fair, the house itself is rather decent and comes equipped with all essential washing machine, AC, fridge type conveniences. If onlyyyyy, however the bloody bathrooms would work! WHAT is it, I wonder - does my sheer presence lead to self destruct mode activation for water pipes, showers, toilet bowls, drainage systems?? I don't get it! And Lokhandwalaaaa, my God curses upon the rich and privileged population of this place that doesn't ever need to travel by the local train! The Andheri station is a good 20 minutes and 45 rupees away! I will go bankrupt just swinging from west to east! Bombay house hunting 101 - your place BETTER be within walking distance of a railway station. Period. First thing I will change in the company - their guest houses. :P

The other thing is the people you live with. This system has the advantage that it offers more privacy than earlier and I can be friendly but keep my distance and not do unnecessary bonding if I don't want to. But oh mannnnn, I miss my Bombay roomies! I miss Yummy and our shared deep enthusiasm about the city and seeing new places and going exploring, I miss her crackpot early morning rituals and the easy talk. I miss all the laughing and ranting sessions with Butts, Wamu and Booty, silly hindi songs on TV and sillier conversations. And Bhoomy, her familiarity, our philosophical rambling, just knowing someone you're completely comfortable with is around. The only thing these girls seem to want to do is crib and find a new nightly watering hole everyday. It gets a little much, though it hasn't yet. :P

The People

I have such an incredible bunch of Bombay people with me! :D God bless Cheapie for dumping Fosters. Having him here is automatic better in every way. For several people, I'm sure hahahaha! :D Sighhhh, what a useless little boy he is. :) Then of course there's Ruth and my Lax, my little baby, I hope she hurries up and comes back from her training! And Butts and Pav and Kora. And Justtttttt! OMG I've just started to spend more time with her and she is simply amazing. One of the few completely NICE people I've ever met. I love her childish enthusiasm for just about everything and her honest upfront style in relationships. She's way too much fun! Buttsy was right :) And soon my Yummy will comeeee! Hurry uppppp, you! Then everything will be that much nicer :D

I'm also so so glad for Mi. Nothing compares to childhood friendships, endless easy flowy talks, total familiarity. Yay! :)

I wonder where Kujo is. Should I call, should I not? :P Also, I'm heading back to Delhi for a week as part of the travelling plans this month. Maybe I can sort things out with P and meet the others. Still debating :P

Now if only someone would assure ME that I'm going to be in Bombay. Pleaseeeeeeee, dear lord let me be in Bombay! *crosses every single finger*

The Bombay-Me is just a better person. A happier person, a more capable person, shopkeepers think I'm like the one on some lame TV show hahhahah! Psychologists live in my building and ask me for help! Bombay people treat me differently. They are kinder somehow. The auto walahs, cab guys, little cleaning boys - they are all nicer. Enthusiastic about their work and content with their lives. Its all nicer :) Let me be in Bombayyyy! :X

Sigh. Enough for today, I think. Detailed news of the last week will hopefully follow shortly. Bye. bye, Bloggy! :)

Trouble letting go :P

2011-05-29T04:43:00.001-07:00

This city just doesn't want me to leave!!

Haha! Woke up at 8 am after less than 3 hours of sleep and hurriedly dressed to leave only to be informed by my thoroughly humored parents that the train tickets never got confirmed! Geez!

Flying now, I guess. Tomorrow evening. And I was all excited about the train journey. Not to mention I was all excited about the goinggggg! :(

Farewell, fair friends.

2011-05-28T15:06:00.000-07:00

Dear Contact Lenses,

As I packed my bags and got ready to bid bye-bye to Delhi today, for who knows how long, and possibly veryyyy long, I couldn't help but feel nostalgic at the sight of the gaping hole in my toiletries kit where you would normally sit. Oh, you've been such a loyal friend to me for all these years, you were literally my eyes to the world when I couldn't see.

I still remember our first time together! How I nervously, yet trustingly carried you on fingertip up to my face. How you instantly transformed yourself to become part of me. The wonder I felt when I looked up through you for the first time! Heh. I also remember our first all nighter :) how mad you were at me the next morning, shifting around over my cornea, trying to act up to show me I had made a mistake! I'm sorry for all the times I over-used you so, my darlings! But you were always patient, always kind, rarely complaining. How I will miss you!

I may have my eyes back now, but all those years with you will always be special! Pari reminded me the other day how we never got to say a proper goodbye, so before we part I'm gonna christen you! You will henceforth be fondly remembered as Aqueous and Vitreous! :D Heheheeh! How's that for humor, right? :)

Thank you for some amazing years!

Love and lubrication, always.

Pure class.

2011-05-28T14:56:00.000-07:00

Rarely has a single team produced such memorable football. Complete class by Barca tonight. After the way they beat Real, they may not have seemed worthy of their place in the final but dear God, how they owned the field it was played out on. I was so sure Fergie would get it right tonight. I was SURE this match would be won on paper first, and it would be pure tactical genius which would see the winner through. Fergie losing to the same guy two times in two finals! Total body blow. And how terrible the way VDS and Scholesy had to go out. But wow, Xavi, Messi, Iniesta, Villa. I would pay money to watch this team on nights when they're playing like this. My money is on Guardie the next Fergie! Its sad, and disturbingly sudden.

Dear Mr and Miss Self Righteous,

2011-05-27T05:52:00.001-07:00

Oh, you're lucky. You're very, very lucky I'm moving to Bombay. But I must offer some useful free advice before leaving this alone (on my private blog, where you will never read it, but the sentiment is there). Re-read your job KRAs. I doubt you will find 'piss your prospective customers off' on the list. I also very much doubt you will find 'break basic privacy rules, go behind people's back and potentially screw with their futures' on the list. And boy, I will be very surprised if 'give people lectures and pat your own back, and then not get the job done and therefore fall flat on your face' on the list. Damn, this is why we give this stuff to you in writing. So that if you forget, because hell that's how stupid you are, you can remind yourself.

Let's hope there's a higher power watching.

Oh, and just so you know - I hate losing my temper. I really do. But you are just that good.

More Spikeyyy! :D

2011-05-26T12:19:00.000-07:00

Said Hamlet to Ophelia,
I'll draw a sketch of thee,
What kind of pencil shall I use?
2B or not 2B?

HAHAHAHAH!! :D

So fair is she!
So fair her face
So fair her pulsing figure

Not so fair
The maniacal stare
Of a husband who's much bigger.

HAHAHAHAHHHAHAHAHH!! *falls off bed!* :D

Philip Le Barr

2011-05-26T12:02:00.000-07:00

Philip Le Barr,
Was knocked down by a car,
On the road to Mandalay.
He was knocked down again
By a dust cart in Spain
And again in Zanzibar.
So,
He traveled at night
In the pale moon light
Away from the traffic growl
But terrible luck
He was hit by a duck
Driven by an owl.

I love Spike Milligan!! :D :D

My Body is a Cage

2011-05-26T10:23:00.000-07:00

What do you do when you win?! - Party!! What do you do when you lose?! - Party harder!!

Vent time. Go away.

2011-05-24T14:00:00.001-07:00

Actually.

I have nothing coherent.

Wait. Actually.

Hot, dusty day. Started the morning by trying to get the bank work done. Took two trips, a lot of harsh words, a lot of energy, a lot of time. Didn't eventually happen either. Have got to figure these things out before its too late. Cancelled plans with the gang in the afternoon again. Just can't seem to deal with this right now. Finally went to the mall again in the evening. No go with the shopping plan but ended up going out to dinner with the parents yet again as dad's birthday eve celebration. Disaster. Even the cold coffee. Gotta stop trying these new restaurants. Passed Rainbow on the way back for the cake though. Totally took me back 8-9 years to my last birthday where we had called Rainbow for cake. Ha. Super deja vu moment. The testimonial match was tonight. To see my boys all as old men just made me cry. Incredible bittersweet. Yet another thing that will never be the same again. Almost makes up for the things that will always be the same. Bombay just isn't coming quickly enough.

God bless you, Miller!

Painnnnnnnn!

2011-05-23T09:54:00.000-07:00

Let this day go down in history as one on which I had:

- No excess hair on my arms, legs, underarms and upper lip

- No black-heads

- Chemically softened, set and straightened hair

How exciting life is for a girl :P

My perfect Dillee day!

2011-05-21T10:41:00.001-07:00

Aujourd'hui, all my favorite Delhi things came together in classic symphony! The result -an uncharacteristically gushy post about my mother-city! :D

The Grameen Sewa and the Delhi Metro

I remember the first time I rode in the Pune tum-tum. It was abso-lutely incredible! The rusty, rustic, crowded, hingey six seater stuffed with 15 people was awesome-ness itself, not just in terms of convenience and cost, but also because it was just such a window into a side of the city and its people we didn't usually interact with. There was this little pigtailed girl with her mother, carrying a bush of green chickpea close to her chest. And the whole ride she sat clutching the bush in one hand, and trying to crack open a pea-pod with the other. It was delightful! And reminded me of myself of course :P

The Grameen Sewa was an equally, or more pleasing discovery. It is Delhi's own version of the shared auto for its village routes, and although the seating capacity regulations are seldom (read: never) followed, and the urban populace of the city is screaming from every roof-top about what a terrible menace it is to civilized society, I loUve it! :D :D

Let's face it - not just in Delhi, but in this entire wonderful country of ours, traffic control for the billion people has literally become a physical impossibility. For years, Delhi's roads have been fraught with dangerous criminally charged murderers, rapers, drunkards and unlicensed mad hatters behind the wheel of every auto, bus, car, cab, rickshaw and truck imaginable. Every DTC bus you pass on the road holds something like 200 people, a generous proportion of which ride on the steps, hanging on to a fragment of a holding rod and praying for dear life. Unsuccessful attempts have been made to address all of these problems, but all of them still exist and are bigger than ever.

The fact of the matter is people in this city have places to get to, and they usually need to get to them fast. In their position they are willing to take whatever they see pass by on the road if it fits their budget and will take them there. I don't know how many people are benefiting across the city from this service, but I do know that for all the nay-sayers, I have never seen a Grameen Sewa vehicle pass by on my route that wasn't stuffed to capacity.

And I don't mind admitting that for Metro travelers like me, who live 5 Kms away from the closest metro station, it serves as the perfect 10 rupee answer to getting to the station or the other stops along the way quick and easy, where otherwise I would be paying 60 bucks to an autowala or waiting endlessly for a bus which doesn't look like its about to burst open to show up.

Besides, the conductors are so funny and chatty! On my route there must be something like 10-15 of these vehicles plying up and down. On each trip the conductors compete with each other to score more passengers. They ride on the door-window, with their butts hanging out and their shirts flying up from the reckless speed the driver's trying to hit, continuously chattering to passers-by trying to get them to accept the ride, sometimes joking with the conductors of the other vehicles, always laughing and cheering like its a daily sport! Its very heartening to see them in action, and veryyyy amusing the way they can sell - even when there are already like 12 people in the 9 seater, and an absolute visible LACK of space, they still manage to push in some poor, sweaty villager from the hot sun and find him a spot to place some portion of his posterior. It is a LESSON for MBAs, I swear to you! Once it caused this aged and quite well-off uncle to grin non-stop for the entire ride, only to comment while getting off, "tum bande kamaal ke ho waise! itne saal mein aisa kabhi nahin dekha maine!" :D :D

Sigh. And ofcourse, there are no words to express just how. great. the Metro is. OMG. I mean, seriously, watch out, Bombay! :)

The Weather

Ha. I bet you're thinking - errr? But honestly, you should have been here today. It was the perfect Delhi Surprise Summer Day. I think Delhi has a weather Santa, who regularly throws its people completely unexpected, out-of-the-blue treats after they have endured the sun for sufficiently long durations. And well, are about to die. :P

Completely unexpectedly then, a day will come when no sun will rise, instead this increy-dible wind will wake you up and invite you outside to play, and then slowly turn into a cold breeze, and then will slowwwwly transform into a spell of delicious cool rain and then will suddenly become a full fledged thunderstorm and give you an orgasm and say to you - Merrrrry Surprise Summer Day!

Then the next day the sun will be back in all its tragic turned-uppyness. But heck, what are we but cellular memories. :)

Connaught Place(s)

Oh, my CP! How happy it makes me to go there! To walk up and down those roads, to peep lovingly into those stores, to hog on its sinful offerings of hundreds of delicious food things! And other places too, my favorite places - my Barista, my CCD, my B-10 market, my Priya, my Satya Niketan, my South ex, my Citywalk! How I will miss them! :X

Childhood Friends

Congratulations. Two months of getting back in touch with many of the people I had left behind has been tremendously therapeutic. But the most important people are the ones who never got left behind. Who still stuck around, still cared, still stayed the same. My Loony, the way all it takes her is two words on an SMS to reduce me to incomprehensible giggles; Funky, for making every single thing he touches with me his own; Mehku, who still speaks the same language as 13 years ago; Jigs, with her knack of showing up in the strangest of ways; These adorable silly little Bhanu and Divya who finally made me realize those college years were not a complete waste; and of course my darling P, who knows exactly what to say, when to do to hit the hardest. He can never be left behind. :)

I heart them! <3 <3 (Speaking of which - I heart <3s! :D)

Hey! I just thought of something *awesome*!! *super broad evil i-know-exactly-how-you-will-react-to-this-dear-bloggy-and-that-makes-me-grin-even-wider grin*

<3li - get it?? Dil-li! HAHAHAHAHAH!!! Mwahahahahah! Bwahahahahahah!! Hee hee hee!

yeah, ok, im done :)

Almost here:

2011-05-18T02:41:00.000-07:00

Bombay days! :D :D

*squee*

Ladies and Gentlemen:

2011-05-17T11:15:00.000-07:00

Mr. Adam Gilchrist! *applause* :)

How totally worth it to be able to see again only to see THAT. Oh man. I so missed Gilly in full flow. And to hear him talkkkkk like that! So sensible, so poised! *sigh* Then there's the entire Mumbai outfit and how it just tugs at me to see Pollock and Jonty there in full reminder of my best cricket memories. Just proves the point that no matter how stupid T20 cricket is, the IPL has some major merits. Not the least of which is (are?) (dang!) being able to have days like these, and watch players like these all over again just for a few brief moments. And now with the SLPL also starting, I can only think thank heavens we Indians were the pioneers! God bless Lalit Modi, but ew the horrors of other domestic T20 tournaments eating into international cricket time - I wonder what direction this will take.

Also - this just makes me all the more nostalgic about the Class of '92 and the Galacticos and Post era! Ohhh! I need a symbol for bittersweet - henceforth, ):)

The funniest thing - when I couldn't see TV, I used to lie around listening to the commentary, only to fall even deeper in love with Harsha Bhogle! Soooo great! And delightful, the way he has these back-and-forths with Simon Doull and Brad Hogg! Hahaha!

Aw, I just love sports! :)

I’m back, Bloggy!

2011-05-17T05:11:00.001-07:00

Oh, how I have missed you, darling! :D And Michael, and my booksies and House and Jane and the TV and Utd’s 19th win! You knowwww, Mumbai lost BOTH the matches that I didn’t watch! This just proves it! Sachin needsssss me! :P :P and it’s suddenly oh-so-fun to facebook! :D How did I ever survive without the internet, I ask myself!

Anyhoo, so updates from the last 10 days: I can SEE! No more assisted vision! Dear Lord, sweet realization dawned in the form that I would never ever want to give up sight in the five senses GD. And also not taste, because ooooh food makes me so happy! It only hit me just how much when Bull and Pari came over to visit during the recuperation and brought chocolates! :D So now, really I don’t know. :P

The Bedroom has become a happy, sunny yellow! :D I started to hate it almost as soon as it was done, but then I reminded myself of all the reasons why it HAD. to. be. yellow, and now I like it again! :D

I cleaned out of the old room and moved all baggage to the new room. How beautiful my books look in their new home! :D Rediscovered old, stashed away stuff which I haven’t had the time to look through fully yet, but look what the mommy dragged out!! My Ryannnnnnnnnn! :D :D

I was deliriously happy and strumming for about 20 very un-musical minutes! After which I settled for just his first photo shoot and clicked about 30 angles :)

Hold on. Vanshaj ka phone :)

Chalo. That was the update! Ab main House dekhungi :D bbye!

Careless Hands :)

2011-05-05T13:10:00.000-07:00

Sultry day, which ended in a liberating shower of warm, sticky, summer rain. And although what I'm about to say should have ordinarily come out sooner, now I have the perfect - well, reverse alibi. Kind of.

(Which brings me to this sidenote - Must peacefully recheck above sentence. What the heck is the antonym of Alibi? And what word am I really looking for?)

Now, the ongoing as-I-was-saying.

A combination of the Miller book and the renovation recently made me revisit my hundred years old yahoo account. Amongst the many middle-of-the-bell-curve realizations of how stupid and childish I used to be, and how poorly structured my emails used to be, and how (horror-of-horrors!) I didn't have this incessant need to sound intellectual, I also realized something else. How hopeful I was. How bright-eyed and grateful. How looking anticipatively ahead all the time.

And I found this email. Old. Like Pope John Paul old. From Blondie. And it made me wonder if all the hope and anticipation had been in vain. And it led to the following retrospection.

In the last five years, I have:-

*Ridden, fallen off, been groped in, defended my virtue on, memorized the routes of, and gotten back on the DTC bus.

*Sat for long hours in a dusty library aisle, reading Donne and Sartre.

*Been in a sound recording studio and pretended to be an RJ.

*Paid a visit to the then-president.

*Taken late evening walks in freezing Delhi winters eating hot Maggi out of a plastic cup.

*Learnt the physiology of a mammalian sneeze, and the anatomy of silver nano particles.

*Scribbled urgent poetry on the back of several nameless registers.

*Squished into a single non AC train compartment for 2 days with 30 other people and sang songs all the way.

*Made friends with people from 12 countries in the world and 14 cities in India.

*Made a human chain across the length of a west coast beach and roared at the water with several screaming teenagers.

*Jived in synchrony with 300 strangers to a foreign song.

*Sat in a thick-walled auditorium with hundreds of students and heard only the adjoining ocean.

*Dissected 12 frogs and 7 earthworms.

*Slow danced at 4.00 in the morning in an almost empty conference plenary.

*Laughed with friends till a little pee came out.

*Fought and fretted over, gone many sleepless nights and worked to the point of break for pure adrenaline.

*Cheered until there was no voice left.

*Cried shamelessly in someone's arms.

*Become a co-founder, an editor, a manager, a vice president, a mentee, a mentor, a co-ordinator, a volunteer, a citizen journalist, a campus ambassador and a young leader.

*Got my hair cut at 7 different parlors.

*Attended Movement Therapy lessons with an american instructor.

*Lived and eaten the HRC classic in 3 cities, visited 6 for business and holidayed in 8 with friends.

*Used and forgotten how to use a Jmol application, a DLS machine, a Transmission Electron Microscope, a Cathode Ray Oscilloscope, a professional film-based SLR and a classical acoustic Gibson.

*Had my first tequila shot.

*Played hide and seek at 3.00 am in the college faculty room.

*Been a bridesmaid.

*Brainstormed, VLOOKUP-ed, competed ruthlessly and completed an MBA.

*Eaten off banana leaves.

*Let my hair loose and leaned out the door of the rusty Bombay local.

*Earned my own money.

*Slept on a mattress full of bed bugs and woke up at dawn to shower before my 5 roommates for 2 months.

*Traveled dirt cheap on tumtums, trains, scooties, rickshaws-with-doors, ferries, grameen sewas and bare-feet.

*Learnt select expletives in several languages.

*Karaoke'd on a sun-burnt beach.

*Stood under exploding fireworks and witnessed a party in the middle of a road.

*Watched the Delhi Metro come alive.

*Looked anticipatively ahead.

Ah, Life. :)

May Day!

2011-05-01T11:28:00.001-07:00

Ek aur, aur phir bas! :D

But I had seen it - their quick mirroring dance, the arms lifting at the same time as they approached each other, lowering as they stepped back, the magic of the wild white cloth growing smaller between them on the dark grass - and what it looked like to me from my lonely perch above them was the purest form of love.

- The World Below, Sue Miller

And in true Georgia style:

Hot, gloomy day. I watched the Mumbai Indians match which they won easily, with Sachin and Rayudu both making 51 runs each, and everyone bowling and fielding well. In the evening there was another discussion about the covering letter. Started reading the Willa Cather at night. Looks promising so far.

And just when I was exhausted with the simple effort of having to sit at home all day, Cheapie came along with - "hawa hawa! aye hawa!" :D :D Hahahahhaha! Vellapanthi has promise!

Gone! Wind! wail

2011-04-28T07:45:00.000-07:00

Okay.

I'll admit it.

I have a problem. And I can't hide it anymore.

So I'm just going to say it.

*flinches*

icannolongerread!

*cringes*

It's true! I can't! I just sit and stare at the book, my mind wandering all over the place, being reminded of random passages from old favorites. Then I start fiddling restlessly, sometimes getting up to quickly re-read some part of some other book, other times to re-check my mail or find something on the internet. Worse, sometimes I just drift off to sleep! Seriously! No matter how interesting the book is! My attention span for the most engaging of authors has withered down to a measly 30-40 minutes at a time. How am I ever supposed to experience any books fully with that?? Oh man! :(

The old days of curling up with the same thick hardbound for hours together. Defiling it, dissecting it to bits. I want thatttttt! This cannot be permanent damage! Must. find. ways. to. revive.

Sigh.

Curses upon you, stupid internet age! Taking me away from my pen, paper days! How Ashley Wilkes-y I feel! :(

Will re-read GWTW. That has never failed me. Hmph!

The Experiment That Came Back to Haunt Them All

2011-04-21T06:26:00.001-07:00

Ha!

That's right, it looks like this again :D

Basically because I decided this is a prettier template; baggage is difficult to lug around when you're going to be travelling; Yellow is the color of the season, but Blue looks pretty too - and I was bored :)

Special thank you to Yummy - you will never believe what I did after hanging up the phone :D

Get off the bus or start enjoying the ride! :P

Summer Vacationing!

2011-04-21T06:13:00.000-07:00

I think it was 7 years ago, in class 10th that I last had this little to do! And although there is that lingering boredom and longing for some kind of action, (Or activity. Action sends the wrong message :P) these holidays have given me a chance to realize the following:

1. Sachin!

The most important was the Juice Bar. I literally have withdrawal symptoms for that cold coffee and look at the photo of Sachin on my phone before going to bed every night.

Also, SCMHRD was where the other Sachin won the orange cap in an IPL season, made 50 test centuries, made 200 runs in an ODI match, and won the World Cup :D

2. People

When a couple of days go by without any contact with the people who I LIVED with for 2 years, I wonder where they are, what they are doing. I constantly see or hear or think of something that I want to run and share with them. Often I even take initiative and get in touch. Even on Facebook. :P

3. Facebook.
Facebook makes sense!

4. Duracell!
Some of these relationships are so definitely permanent. They are so going to be long term. Yeah. That feels good to say :)

5. Work
The physical comforts of exercise are unmatched by those of rest. It is in work, activity, movement that we truly feel energized. Relaxation is absolutely draining. It makes you so tired, so fast. Work is utter exhilaration. Both emotional and mental. But specially physical.

6. Choice.
The feeling that you can just - up and do. That feeling. I miss that.

7. Special moments
Walking back at night, carrying books, riding the bus, entering the hostel, people in their pyjamas everywhere, so at home, the shower, feeling your way around the room with the light off, the familiarity, round and round and round the campus, talking endlessly, privileges in the academic block, drives at 4 in the morning, travelling with friends, fried rice, having neighbors, being in such proximity. No running, no hiding :)

8. Hahah!
Families come in all shapes and forms - some are elaborate, some are complex, some are multifaceted, some are interrelated. I love this whole thing with Yummy, Booty and Bhaji! So do victories. Some are moral, some emotional, some physical. And funny words are the coolest! Words like Boobies and Bloobies and Butts and Cheapie! They're all super fun :)

9. Doctors and Teachers
I always choose the Houses over the Shepherds, and the Aptes over the Venkats. I always say its because when it happens I would like to *feel* like I am treated different. Its true. Sometimes I think I can live my whole life with someone dropping me a few hints like mile-markers between now and when I'll finally be sure. I can live it out on the internet, long distance, no contact, no strings. I can do very well and have a lot of fun. But other times - it has to be whole, it has to be real, there has to be a complete and utter - I can't even find the word. It has to *be* different.

10. Amusement.
I like feeling amused. I'm just not looking for anything casual :D

11. Timing
Second place is the worst you can do. I would rather come in last, or not run the race, or come in third than be second. Second place just screws with your head till you lose all the answers. I will never be okay with being second.

12. All the same

Everyone is unique, just like everyone else! I learnt that so long ago but it still surprises me to see live examples. The cute ones, the creative ones, the genius ones, the eccentric ones, the realistic ones - all the same :D

Yeah. 2 months of realizations have just begun :)